Testimonials

Transcript – Morgan’s Story – How I beat Opium and Cocaine addiction with Ibogaine

Two months ago, I was living, comfy, in this prison that I created for myself you know? This isolation cell. I stopped seeing my friends, I felt guilty about using, you know? And all in legal ways, I mean, I was getting prescribed opium from my doctor and getting pure peruvian ‘C’. And it was a lonely place.

I had heard about ibogaine before, and all of a sudden I had this flash, it’s like: oh, Ibogaine can reset your addiction. So, I started to look for places and found Tabula Rasa.

And prior to taking the test dose, I did feel a bit of fear. I was like: oh my god, I’m really doing this! I’m really doing this, and then that was moment when I was afraid of being confronted with my deepest demons, but I mean, I had already taken the pill so I knew if I would, you know, put more energy into that, I’d have freaked out, and I didn’t want that, so I let go. Well, apparently my heart stopped, I went into a seizure and my heart stopped.

My heart had been acting out on the monitor for quite a while apparently, so Fred was already anticipating the worst-case scenario. And I’m telling you, I’m so glad he was here. Because, you know they do Iboga sessions up on the hill, you have to walk for two hours before you get there, and just imagine, when something goes wrong. Not so cool is being taken away by the ambulance…the bright lights, did not agree at all with the plant. There was a shock, I remember them shaving my chest, my hairy chest and then they took me away. I spent the next two days in cardiology in Beja. And when I came back, I was treated with… you know, real food, and I was around surrounded by faces I knew. And even when I arrived at the hospital, there was one point when I realized that I had no withdrawal symptoms. My back wasn’t hurting, and I wasn’t having cold sweats and hot sweats, and restless legs, and diarrhoea, and the feeling that something was crawling up on my skin, and feeling sick like, puking. And there’s none of that. As a matter of fact, three days later, I realized that my tinnitus had disappeared. The ringing in my ears, that appeared two years ago, suddenly on my birthday, disappeared on my birthday again. I took iboga, on my birthday and I died on my birthday, and I was resuscitated on my birthday. So, the expectation I had of being reborn was actually, literally given to me.

The first few days were tough. As far as energy in my body, if you want to talk about how I felt physically: I felt like a hundred years old. I looked like a 100 years old, and I mean, I shuffled my feet slowly like an old man and almost careening down the hall, barely making it to the table… day by day I started to feel better. Don’t expect the plant to do everything for you, you have to do quite a bit of footwork.

And I think the things that they do here, even though you might feel a bit of resistance before, like breathwork and the Kundalini Yoga, it really has been very very very beneficial before it took me, I would say, about 3 months to feel such like. I’ve detoxed before and this is by far, perhaps in my case, a traumatic experience, but also the most profound experience that I’ve ever had. How quickly I was able to shift to become, even when I look at myself in the mirror, I feel like another person. I have reconnected with parts of myself, at moments I’ve reconnected with myself, I really have. Iboga is like a facilitator. There’s someone that gives you the tools, or the will to use these tools, tools that are given to reconnect to yourself and stop being in a prison, in an isolation cell.

I feel electrified, I feel touched, I feel blessed. Just do it, just come and do it. I did it. I’m glad I did.

I’m looking to a shift of perception, and time when medicinal plants become a more integral part of our culture, like there are in other cultures, and I’m grateful for people who put such a thing together.

Disclaimer: Ibogaine is a potentially illegal substance (often sits in a grey area of the law), and we do not encourage or condone the use of this substance where it is against the law. However, we accept that illegal drug use occurs, and believe that offering responsible harm reduction information and solutions is imperative to keeping people safe. For that reason, we share client testimonials, post treatment with Tabula Rasa Retreat, to show that there are ‘other ways’ to tackle addiction and spiritual malaise. We consider ibogaine as a very useful ‘tool’ in the recovery toolbox. Ibogaine is a safe option, if used responsibly, and where strict safety protocols are followed.

You are safe with us.
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Tabula Rasa Retreat has rapidly positioned itself as Europe’s premier ibogaine clinic. Located in the Alentejan region of Portugal, its clientele is mainly from the United Kingdom, Northern Europe, UAE and the USA. All treatments undergo medical vetting and are medically monitored and supervised. Our medical staff are ACLS trained. To support ibogaine treatments, expect holistic therapies such as breathwork, bodywork, massage, meditation, kundalini yoga, reiki, gong baths, drumming circles, equine assisted therapy, personal training and nutrition advice. This is further supported by 1:1 counselling and group therapy by our in-house counsellors.
For further information visit www.tabularasaretreat.com or call PT +351 965 751 649 UK +44 7961 355 530